He Is Sick Of Relationships, But I Want Him!
[ He Is Sick Of Relationships, But I Want Him! ]
I have this guy friend who I really like, but he just got out of this bad relationship at the same time as I got out of one. He told me that he never wants to be in another relationship again. I sometimes feel that he only sees me as a tomboy friend, but at the same time he treats me differently from his other female friends. We hang out every day, and do everything together. Even at one point a man thought we were a couple and he agreed with the man. I try to look for other signs to see if he might feel that way. What sort of signs should I look for? I am too scared to simply ask him because our friendship is too important to me and I am scared of making him uncomfortable.
- LOVE AFTER LOVE
Dear LOVE AFTER LOVE,
Would you date a guy that walked around with a knife in his chest? Would someone date you if you left a trail of blood everywhere you went? You and him are not ready for any kind of relationship, enjoy being single.
There is a possibility that this guy is not dating material. There are many jerks out there that do not want to commit to a girl but be treated by her as if he’s her boyfriend. Don’t be easy. When you’re healed up from your previous relationship only then let a man win your heart. Don’t go chasing guys, it’s pretty pathetic. It’s more pathetic than living the rest of your life alone with 10 cats!
He has given you two signs: “Stop” and “Children At Play.” He’s tired of being committed to one girl that ended up being a psycho. Part of the healing process is eating a lot of cheesecake and not calling guys. When guys call you during this time, you need to politely decline their offers to get you drunk or anything else that they have in mind. During the healing process is a good time to go to college for 3 years and get a degree in Psychology.
When your heart is ready for another relationship you will need to practice injecting subtle messages of availability into conversations with men that are husband material (Why husband material? Well, you’re looking not to get your heart crushed in 3 years right?).
Lets practice injecting those messages into various conversation:
Potential Husband #1: What’s up homie?
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Hi Potential Husband #1, not much.
Potential Husband #1: You look bootylicious!
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Thank you, nice socks!
Potential Husband #1: There’s going to be a party at Bob’s place tonight. Want to chill with us?
LOVE AFTER LOVE: No thank you, but I wouldn’t mind going out for a romantic dinner instead.
Potential Husband #2: Hi LOVE AFTER LOVE! I haven’t seen you in ages!
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Hey Potential Husband #2! I know, I got my degree in Psychology! How have you been?
Potential Husband #2: How cool! I’ve been well. I’m here to pick up some medicine for my sick Grandpa Frank. He’s not doing so well and might not make it.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Oh, I’m sorry! That is very sad. Its nice of you to get him medicine.
Potential Husband #2: It’s the least I can do for him. You can stop by and say "hi" to him if you like.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: No, I don’t think that would be a good idea. Potential Husband #2, you poor thing this must be a very hard time for you. I think that romantic walk on the beach would help relax you.
Potential Husband #3: License and registration please! Do you know how fast you were going?
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Apparently not fast enough!
Potential Husband #3: Good one Mrs. LOVE AFTER LOVE, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you a ticket.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Is that necessary? I’ve never gotten a ticket before…
Potential Husband #3: I’m afraid so.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: It so hard being a single woman, paying for everything, and on top of that a ticket.
Potential Husband #3: It must be tough.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: Since I was a little girl I’ve always felt that I was going to marry the first police officer that gives me a ticket.
Potential Husband #3: Errr… Okay, I’m going to let you off with a warning this once.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: How do I reach you if I have any questions about the ticket?
Potential Husband #3: I’m not giving you a ticket.
LOVE AFTER LOVE: What if I still have questions?
Potential Husband #3: I got to run, uuuh there’s been some murder bomb kidnapping… Drive safely!
Knowing how to inject availability messages into conversations is not going to make you look desperate when you return to the dating scene. Last but not least, dump your guy friends. 99% of them want you for one thing only and that one thing is not them committing to a relationship with you. Get some girlfriends instead but make sure that you’re better looking than all of them.