My Girlfriend’s Family Hates Me!

 
[ My Girlfriend's Family Hates Me! ]

 

Dear Kip,

I am a 26 year old man who’s been dating a 25 year old woman for the past 8 months. It’s one of the best relationships that I’ve ever been in. She’s kind, caring, loving, affectionate, honest, and loyal. This is also the longest relationship she has ever been in. So my problem is this: She still lives at home with her parents, her family is 100 percent Italian and I’m Polish. Her mother told her about 4 months ago she is not to speak to me, see me or have anything to do with me. So my girlfriend has been lying to her parents for around 4 months now, promising me she’s going to talk to them for the past 3 1/2 months about me. This has created problems within my family that I am a secret boyfriend. I have voiced my opinion several times to her only to have her cry and stay "I’m sorry" or that she hasn’t had a chance to talk to them yet. She also hangs up on me if her mom or dad walk past her and she’s on the phone with me. I do love this girl, yet I know I’m an idiot for putting up with this for as long as I have. She’s concerned about her parents kicking her out of the house for still dating me. I have already told her she can live with me if that happens. So I really don’t know what to do because my patience is almost nonexistent at this point.
 

- Patient Idiot

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Dear Patient Idiot,

Good women are worth fighting for but this one is really pushing it. Married couples that do not separate themselves from their families (become their own family and make their own decisions whether or not others approve) end up destroying their marriage. You both are only dating and already encountered family problems. She needs to decide if she wants to be with you or with her family.

Find the perfect day to talk with your girlfriend. Make sure that a lot of things aren’t going on with her on that day. Let her know that you want to have a serious talk and hopefully she won’t exhort to tears. She has to face reality and realize that this problem won’t "just fix itself" or just go away.

If your talk with her doesn’t do any good, then you’ll have to try a different approach. Whether you, your girlfriend, or her parents like it or not, you will need to move in with your girlfriend’s family. This is the toughest step and be prepare to hear a lot of the most interesting Italian swearwords and metaphors. The first two weeks will be the hardest for you. If you are able to take a vacation, do it before you move in with them.

Even though your stay with your girlfriend family will be unwelcomed, obey all of your girlfriend’s father’s house rules. Under no circumstances should you try to share a room with your girlfriend. It won’t happen without bloodshed. It might turn out that your room is a small corner in the basement or attic, deal with it! 

Now here comes the easy part, live with your girlfriends family until you breakup with your girlfriend or until her family learns to love you. If your girlfriend is worth fighting for… you know what to do!

 

Go get her!

- Kip