My Wife Is Also Married To Another Man!
[ My Wife Is Also Married To Another Man! ]
My life has been like a sweet dream until now. Here is my story: I met this young woman in Buffalo NY back in 2004 while visiting my parents on vacation. We met at my uncles 57th birthday party and she seemed to know my family really good. We had a blast and we went out every night while I was there. We had a long distance relationship for about a year and a half and then finally decided to get together. She moved in with me in late 2005 and we got married the following spring. We have a 1.5 year old cute boy and she’s 3 months pregnant again. Here where my sweet dream became a nightmare. My wife of 4 years is married to another man. After accidently seeing some of her old paper work while looking for her car title, I stumbled upon a photocopy of a marriage certificate. My first question to her was, “Why didn’t you tell me before that you were married?” It turns out that the guy lives in Canada and they got separated, but never divorced. I’m really mad at her, and I don’t know what to do. Should I divorce her or force her to file for divorce where ever her other husband lives? After all, I now think that she got married to me just to use me and then get back with her "real" husband, but she denies it. I just want to know what other people would do in my shoes. Thanks in advance.
- THE OTHER HUSBAND
Dear THE OTHER HUSBAND,
Are you crazy? Maybe your shared wife needs more than one man to be satisfied. I’m kidding of course but it’s a possibility. No one is out to get your money. From what I know, your marriage is null and void in the court of law if she was married at the time of marrying you.
Let’s say she is using you, why have babies with you? You are the creator of your own nightmare. I’m not saying that she did the right thing by hiding her marriage from you. I’m not defending her, but it’s extremely hard to tell someone you’re in love with, that you are married to someone else… What if she really loves you and that she’s hiding from her past? She was probably afraid that she would lose you by revealing her secret to you. Could you not tell if her feelings for you were real? Don’t tell me that love is blind and that you don’t know; you have a second kid on the way.
If you were to buy a used car, would you not get a CARFAX report before buying it? If you’re such a paranoid person, you should have background checked her years ago. So put your conspiracy theories away and work out your problems with your wife. It’s pretty simple. She either divorces him and gets to be with you, or she leaves you for him, or finds a third husband, who knows…
This is your chance to restart your relationship with your wife with no secrets (background check her first). If you doubt that the kids are yours, DNA check them before “restarting” the relationship. Leave no room for mistrust.
Her actions do not give you a free pass at having a second wife. I’m sure one is more than enough for you.