Missing The Love
Dear Kip,
I dated this one girl for 2 years, we had a very nice romantic relationship, but I drove a semi-truck across the country, and was gone most of the time. After the 2 years, we broke up. Later on, I changed jobs and I’m local now. I have a lot of time, but she doesn’t want to get back together with me. I tried everything! I took her on dates, I bought her flowers, and other things. She’s says that she only wants to be friends for now. Do you think she’s seeing someone else, or maybe it’s just over between us two? I really want her back and I don’t know what and how to do it. I did everything for her and even gave up my football and beer.
Please help!
- MISSING THE LOVE
Dear MISSING THE LOVE,
Stop feeling sorry for yourself! I’m sure that many people have and will tell you to move on and to just get over it. Yes, it’s easy to say and maybe they’re right. But, if they’re maybe right then they are also maybe wrong. Since, you don’t want to move on and since they might be wrong… I see only one solution: Win her back!
There is a saying in my ex-country “A drowning man clutches at straw.” In desperate circumstances you must try everything possible even at the risk of failure. You being a truck driver gives you an advantage: You are tough and you can put up with the lack of sleep [not to mention football and beer].
Doing the follow would probably work on just about any girl:
1. Lose the gut – Only your guy friends will ever appreciate your beer belly.
2. Get your back waxed – You are not a bear!
3. Master the Italian accent – Nothing is sexier than hearing a man say “ti voglio bene” in perfect Italian.
4. Write your feelings on paper and then text them to her – It might be hard at first but even “I love you more than my Xbox” can be the most touching words for a woman.
5. Call her MANY times per day – Women love attention. She might yell at you but secretly deep inside… She’ll love it!
6. Try to get a job at her office – This way she’ll see what she’s really missing.
7. Make sure that you’re on good terms with her mother – Mothers are best for “putting a good word in” and knowing what’s best.
8. Make sure you have a voice, VOTE – Silence is oppression.
9. Have a “Plan B” – Her sisters and best friends will do. [Avoid putting down Hollywood stars for your “Plan B”]
10. Buy her expensive jewelry and beg her to take you back – This is the most important step. Women love jewelry and men that beg.
If you still can’t win her… You always have “Plan B.”
I hope everything works out for you and I hope to receive a success story letter from you!
-Kip
